Short post:
Ever skip a night's sleep, just to find yourself too wired to get any rest the next evening? Counterintuitive as it seems, the last time I went to sleep was about 48 hours ago, and I don't feel tired.
I wish I did. Tomorrow's going to be a hell of a day.
I'm leaving Ottawa in a few short hours with Bryan and Kyle, en route to Nez's kidnapping in Ohio, and onward to see Sophie in Alabama. Between Ottawa and Toronto, I'll also be picking up a few drifters. Two housemates I found on craigslist's rideshare, one Carleton grad from PickupPal, and my friend Rachel from a small town in the middle of nowhere (because nothing beats five straight hours of unmitigated sexual tension.)
And I've barely begun to pack.
Nonetheless, it's been a hectic 48 hours; spent, for the most part, convincing and re-convincing my friends to commit to the odyssey, and persuading their parents to support their self-actualization with cold, hard gas money.
But through bouts of vacillation, flared tempers, doubt and uncertainty, this show is finally getting on the road. In 36 hours' time. I'll be in Birmingham.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Sunday, June 15, 2008
So I got fucking arrested last night...
I'd type up the full story, but I'm feeling far too lazy to do all that writing this afternoon. I'll just copy and paste from the MSN conversation where I tell a friend:
This isn't some third-world junta. This is Ottawa! I realize how melodramatic this kind of thing is going to sound, but our society is based on the rule of law. A police officer is granted - rightly - certain authorities over other citizens for the good and welfare of society; but a badge is not carte-blanche to give orders arbitrarily under the guise of legal authority. I got arrested for sitting on a public bench, breaking no laws, and I fully intend to make a scene over this.
I'm not a petty criminal. I'm not a menace to society. I don't have a criminal record; christ, I've never been arrested before. And even if these things were not the case, I would still be in the right.
I still can't believe it. I was never aggressive or belligerent. I never lost my temper or even raised my voice. When they asked me to leave their property, I left. When they asked me not to even touch the railing, I complied. But when a bouncer tries to order me off of a public bench on a public sidewalk, he has every right to go fuck himself; when an officer of the law does the same, I wanted that order on paper.
Rachel - what did you do to [PR]? PR - lol PR - long story Rachel - i hear there are handcuffs involved PR - there were PR - hold on, I'll grab a beer first Rachel - lol Rachel - drinking alone...oh no PR - hey, I've earned this one Rachel - okay dish Rachel - I cant wait any longer lol PR - lol I've heard that one before PR - I'm doing this at my pace Rachel - thats what she said PR - lol Rachel - fine but i get all the details PR - okay, so one of the AEPi alums had his birthday today at the Heart and Crown on Preston PR - I'm too broke to go drinking, but I figured I'd come over and give him my regards Rachel - and I take it this is where it starts to get interesting PR - you have no idea Rachel - :) Rachel - go on PR - so since I'm not drinking, I saddle up the loser cruiser and head to the Heart and Crown Rachel - ... PR - if I were to be drinking, I wouldn't take the car PR - but that's not relevant, so I'll keep going Rachel - lol and you mean boat O - boat Rachel - and do go on PR - so I find a parking space a few blocks away, and walk over PR - the place is packed PR - I find my friends, and there aren't even enough chairs for everyone at the table PR - we're outside, and half of us are just off the property across the little metal rail PR - so eventually I go over the rail to greet another friend who just got in from toronto PR - about a minute later, a bouncer comes up to me and says "Are you planning to come back inside?" PR - and I say "Yeah" PR - "Don't bother. You're kicked out." Rachel - wtf PR - I know PR - my friends were pretty stunned that I just got kicked out of the heart and crown for hopping onto the sidewalk over the rail, and they suggest I ask nicely to come back in PR - so I go to the bouncer, and I say "Look, I didn't realize what a dick move that was back there. Is there any way you can let me back in?" PR - "no." Rachel - ouch PR - yeah, but that's his right Rachel - Im gunna grab a banana...brb...keep talking though PR - np Rachel - lol and Im going to eat it...nothing dirty so dont even say it PR - so I go back to where my friends are, and just lean against the rail from the sidewalk side PR - about 5 minutes later, the bouncer tells me to go home PR - I say "Are you telling me that I can't be on public property?" PR - he says "get off this sidewalk" Rachel - wow he really had it out for you PR - so I ask if he can legally ask me to get off of a public bench and sidewalk if I'm not causing a disturbance? PR - and I was right PR - so he says to my friends, "alright, I can't kick this guy off the bench, but if any part of his body crosses over that rail, you're all kicked out" PR - "fine." PR - and that was the last time any part of me was within their property PR - so I stay on the bench and tlak with my friends PR - and when the waitress comes by, I ask to speak to the manager PR - she says that they're really busy, and that it oculd be a while PR - *couldc PR - *could PR - I tell her "don't worry, I'm not in any rush" PR - so after about 10 minutes or so, the manager comes up to me with the bouncer PR - I told her I was sorry about hopping the rail onto the sidewalk, and would if be possible to rejoin my friends on the other side? PR - she says no. their liquor license requires that they kick out someone who does that PR - which isn't unreasonable for her Rachel - yah but you were sober PR - not a fucking sip PR - but she was right on that point PR - her hands were tied, and I didn't have a problem with that PR - I wasn't going to argue PR - then she says, "if you're going to cause a problem, we can call the police" PR - I say "I'm not going to cause anything. If I can't come back in, then what I will do is stay on this public bench. I hope you don't call the police, but I'm not doing anything wrong. If you want to, that's your perrogative." Rachel - lol PR - so they leave, and I go back to talking to my friends PR - who are pretty amazed at what just happened PR - then Jeremy says "they're coming back with police" Rachel - LOL are you fuckig serious PR - I'm facing away from the cops, and I don't turn around. PR - I just ask how far away they are PR - "about 20 seconds" Rachel - omfg PR - so I keep talking to jeremy for about 20 seconds PR - from a public bench, on a public sidewalk Rachel - sober too PR - keep in mind, at no point in this evening have I had a drink, lost my temper, or even raised my voice PR - well, I had 5 drinks as soon as I got to sunnyside PR - but again, not relevant Rachel - lol PR - so I keep talking to jeremy until I feel the cop grab me my the arm from behind PR - he tells me to leave PR - I ask on what grounds PR - he says "tresspassing" Rachel - wtf Rachel - that is SUCH bullshit PR - I tell him that I'm on a public bench Rachel - leave it to the cops to take the side of the buisness PR - and that I have no plans to trespass on their property PR - and he says - and I'm not making this up - "you're in my city" Rachel - bastard PR - "you've got two choices: you can go home, or you can go to jail" Rachel - wtf Rachel - you CANNOT be arrested for that shit PR - I ask him if he's going to arrest me for sitting on a public bench Rachel - what an arrogant pig PR - so he says again, "you can go home, or you can go to jail" PR - I say "I'd like that in writing" Rachel - lol Rachel - o0o Rachel - you badass PR - so he says "hands on the railing. you're under arrest." PR - "here's your writing" Rachel - OMG Rachel - no wayy PR - way. PR - so he puts the handcuffs on, and my friends are just in shock Rachel - thats kind of hot though...Id like to be arrested lol PR - lol PR - my friend called me after to ask why I was grinning while getting cuffed PR - I didn't realise I was grinning Rachel - lool Rachel - omg I WISH i could have seen that PR - so he calls a squad car, (code 93 or something), and leads me to it Rachel - lol tell me more PR - sorry, back Rachel - but really that is pretty hot...you got arrested PR - so once we're out of earshot, he says "I'm going to tell you one more time. You can go home, or you can go to jail." PR - sorry, my bad PR - "You can go home, or you can go to jail and do this by the book" PR - I tell him "I haven't done anything wrong tonight, officer. I think I'd like to do this by the book." PR - so he puts me in the squad car and turns me over to the officer driving it Rachel - LOL Rachel - man I really wish i could have seen this go down PR - lol PR - I'm so pissed off at my friends PR - when he said "hands on the railing" PR - I gestured at them to get a fucking camera out PR - and they just stood there like idiots Rachel - LOL Rachel - fuck Rachel - that sucks PR - I wanted a picture of that Rachel - a picture would have been epic PR - a) because it would have come in handy in court O - and b) because it looks badass Rachel - omg yes Rachel - that would be a hot picture Rachel - i dont know what it is but anything related to jailtime= hot PR - sorry to disappoint you, rachel, but I never went to jail Rachel - lol you coudnt handle it PR - the second cop wasn't as big a dick. He drove me around the corner and said that I wasn't being held PR - I told him I'd like to get everything on the record anyway Rachel - I once found out a guy i found attractive did about 3 years in jail..and it turned me on Rachel - lol Rachel - i take it he just toko you home then? Rachel - *took PR - no PR - after I told him. I said I wanted to be given the breathalyzer test Rachel - good. PR - I hadn't had anyhting to drink PR - but that car didn't have a test machine PR - I asked if any nearby squad cars did PR - he said "it doesn't matter, you're not driving home, are you?" PR - and I said that yes, I was. PR - so he asks what kind of car I own, and where it's parked PR - when we get to it, he lets me out of the squad car, and smells my breath PR - which pissed me off, because I wanted an actual readout for the record Rachel - yah Rachel - that is SUCH bullshit! PR - then he unlocks the handcuffs and hands me a charge citation for trespassing Rachel - but a bunch of guys from your frat saw it happen...your a legend lol Rachel - whatttt PR - yeah PR - I ask him how I go about disputing that in court PR - he says that the info's all on the citation, and that if I challenged it, he would testify against me. Rachel - jackass PR - once I got into my car, he drove off Rachel - he wasnt even there PR - I checked the 20 messages I'd gotten in the 10 minutes since I got arrested, then came back here Rachel - omfg that is bullshit Rachel - definately fight that PR - I will. Rachel - lol but [PR]...you got arrested Rachel - how hot Rachel - is that PR - hey, when I was asked to leave the bar, I left. When they told me not to touch their railing, I didn't. But when a bouncer tells me to get off a public sidewalk, he can go fuck himself. Rachel - oh definately PR - and when a cop does the same, I made him arrest me Rachel - that is such bullshit Rachel - lol Rachel - oh you badass PR - lol fuck off Rachel - lol PR - I'm way too irritated right now to deal with sarcasm Rachel - you may not find it great now but im sure its a story you will love telling PR - oh, you have no idea Rachel - and im serious that shit is hot Rachel - you got arrested Rachel - hott PR - lol PR - seirously though, apparently I was grinning the entire time Rachel - you would PR - I did. PR - so what did you do tonight? Rachel - I talked to Hani about how I got ditched for the black BBQ and then I tried to help him come up with a name for his team for guild wars PR - lol Rachel - they ended up with the same lame name they started with Rachel - and you know i had one of those days where i take forever getting ready only to get fucking ditched Rachel - im so pissed PR - I think the funniest part was when I was in the squad car PR - and I was crushing the cigarettes in my back pocket PR - now, you obviously don't reach into a pocket to grab an unknown object while in police custody Rachel - lol PR - so I ask, "Officer, I'm just going to reach into my pocket to move my cigarettes to somewhere that they won't get crushed" PR - so he says okay PR - then he asks "What's a guy like you doing smoking anyway?" PR - and I say.... PR - I know you've read my blog, so you probably know the answer PR - "shiny packaging and peer pressure" PR - sarcasm: not always the ebst approach PR - *best Rachel - lol Rachel - not with cops Rachel - its best to let them dominate Rachel - lol PR - whatever, I got their names. Rachel - good PR - I'm not going to go home because a cop threatens to arrest me. not if I haven't broken a law Rachel - fuck that is so messed up Rachel - but still..hott Rachel - lol PR - lol thanks Rachel - how were their cuffs? PR - left some bruises, but otherwise not bad Rachel - damn Rachel - I want some of those PR - they feel the same as the ones I have, but they ratcheted them tighter than I do ...
This isn't some third-world junta. This is Ottawa! I realize how melodramatic this kind of thing is going to sound, but our society is based on the rule of law. A police officer is granted - rightly - certain authorities over other citizens for the good and welfare of society; but a badge is not carte-blanche to give orders arbitrarily under the guise of legal authority. I got arrested for sitting on a public bench, breaking no laws, and I fully intend to make a scene over this.
I'm not a petty criminal. I'm not a menace to society. I don't have a criminal record; christ, I've never been arrested before. And even if these things were not the case, I would still be in the right.
Labels:
Democracy,
Douchebaggery,
Rachel
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